Golden nights

What a difference two years can make. From January 2016 to January 2018. Same people, same place but a completely different state of mind and heart. I remember that time from two years ago very well and then there was this past Saturday which I wish I never had to face and I wouldn’t ever remember.

2016 – buzzing, all butterflies. Smiling and shining – right and left. So sure of everything. Temptation is all there, it’s mutual. Had been craving for something out of this world and I had it right there. Oh, what a fairytale. Felt like I hit the jackpot and it’s only up from there.

2018 – broken, empty. Unsure about everything. Where to go, how to stand up again. Feeling small and unworthy, right there in front of you. Trying to catch a little glimpse of something burning in those eyes. Nothing. I got completely nothing. Do I even need to say how that feels? It just left a massive lump in my throat that I don’t know how to get rid of it now.